Six Month Post Grad Update: I was jobless for half a year, and it wrecked me.
Have you ever considered that you might find your worth through the job you have or the work you produce? Maybe you find thorough enjoyment and identity in being productive and busy. But what happens when you are placed in a season of quietness, stillness and maybe even silence?
This past May, I graduated from Bible college with a degree in communications. I’ve always been the self productive and busy type of person. You’d find me in my room reading books and writing papers for hours. Or you would find me hustling around campus with my camera taking pictures for the school publishing team. There was one summer when I had to work two jobs to save up money for school. For the past four years, I have experienced an abundance and outpouring of God’s goodness and blessings. He provided me with wonderful opportunities to work for Moody Publishers, and He gave me fantastic friends that kept me busy. I would share with my friends how exhausted I was and how much I longed for moments of rest. Little did I know that God would do that exact thing.
The transition after college is hard and exhausting. It’s full of the unknown. People always say that it’s nothing like college and that job searching is incredibly difficult. I’ve been jobless for six months. I have lost count of all the jobs I’ve applied to as they are far too many. My days are empty with no obvious objective or goal I have to accomplish. There is no paper deadline I have to meet nor steady income coming into my checking account. This is not the life I envisioned for myself. Honestly, I’ve been wrestling with my purpose. This season of quietness, rest and silence has not been encouraging as I wanted it to be. Instead, I am left feeling empty and depleted. Being jobless has struck a chord within me that probes at my self worth. It probes my identity and purpose. Maybe you are experiencing a similar season like mine too.
Yet, Ecclesiastes reminds us that life is fleeting. Jobs and work are fleeting too. This book focuses on a wise teacher who examines all life situations and evaluates its meaning. Many may read this book and see how gloomy it is. It’s definitely not the happiest book of the Bible, but I believe that there is a reason why this book is included in God’s Holy Scriptures. It points to God’s sovereignty in the midst of a fleeting life. There are two things that Ecclesiastes can encourage us in a jobless season.
“Yet Ecclesiastes reminds us that life is fleeting.”
Work is vanity (Eccles. 2:21-23).
The word “vanity” used in Ecclesiastes is translated into the Hebrew word “Hevel”. Hevel means vapor or smoke. The nature of smoke is that it quickly vanishes. When you try to reach for this substance, you only grab remnants of it before it’s gone. Wouldn’t you say that life can sometimes be like that? You think you have it all together, but then something goes wrong or ends up not going the way you planned it to.
We love being in control of our life. We have our calendars and bullet journals that tell us what to expect for the upcoming month. We curate a spotless resume and cover letters to land the perfect job, study super hard to receive a good grade on our papers, and figure out clever messages to send to our dream guy so he recognizes us… This list can go on. But the honest truth is that life is constantly changing. It doesn’t always happen the way we want it to. This includes not getting the job that we feel the most qualified for.
Jobs are short lived and vanishing. This truth is my source of encouragement in a jobless season. It forces and disciplines me to see that my jobs cannot define the meaning of my life. A few months ago, I landed three interviews within one week with a job I really wanted. I remember feeling so certain that this was God’s plan for me because everything aligned together. I started connecting dots and trying to piece together this amazing plan I had for my future. Yet in the end, I received an email saying that the company would be moving forward with another candidate. My heart dropped as waves of confusion roamed in my head. Work is vanity. It’s meaningless. God taught me at that moment that I have no control over my life, but only he does. He stripped away a lot of things I prided myself in including the work I produced, job positions and titles I had. As excruciating as it was, it gave me an opportunity to trust a sovereign, good and kind God who knows my future.
The teacher in Ecclesiastes understands this reality and warns us of the fleeting nature of our work. It seems as though the teacher is trying to spoil the facade of a perfect life here on Earth before we get hurt by its disappointments. Even if someone gets an amazing job and works really hard for it, it’s still pointless. It’s pointless because all their hard work will eventually be handed down to someone else who may or may not be as ambitious as they were (Ecclesiastes 2:18-19).
When we apply for a job we really want, we may end up not getting it. The job opportunity might go with other candidates leaving us to simply wonder why we weren’t the chosen ones. Maybe for some of us, we have the job we have always dreamed of. We work super hard to get to the top, get promoted or make the most money, but one day we will leave that position to someone else who might not put as much work or effort in it as we did (Ecclesiastes 2:18-26). The teacher in Ecclesiastes is not trying to discourage us from working, but he is trying to help us see the bigger picture that life is never going to happen the way we want it to. So, don’t put too much hope and value in the things that are never guaranteed. Instead, channel all that hope and trust in God who is in control and remains constant.
Enjoy life even in the jobless seasons because it is a gift from God (Eccles. 2:24-25).
Despite the sad tone of Ecclesiastes 2, there is one good thing that can be gleaned from this passage. Enjoy life even though it’s random. Seem like odd advice huh? But the simple truth that Ecclesiates encourages us with is this: enjoy life even though it drives you and I crazy because we aren't in control. This is such a simple lesson that is so hard to grasp.
I love focusing on the future. I’m always looking forward to what’s ahead of me instead of enjoying what’s right in front of me. Being absorbed with the future can suck the life of the present. When we are younger, all we want is to become older. When we are older, all we want is to become younger. But it’s time that we start wanting the life and age we are right now. This is a reality that all of us struggle with. It’s hard feeling contentment and joy in life if all we can dwell upon is what we don’t have.
“It’s time we start wanting the life and age we are right now.”
I’ve been applying to many jobs without any of them reaching out. It felt like I had no future ahead of me. It seemed like all these doors were being shut. I honestly didn’t know how to cope with all the “no’s” I was receiving from God. Since being home, I have a lot of time on my hands to think about life. There’s a lot of time for me to do things I’ve never done before. One day, I wanted to cook some soup for my family. We have a small garden full of lettuce leaves outside of my house. I put on my shoes and walked outside. I started to rip the lettuce leaves and put them in my bowl. The ten minutes I spent outside harvesting fresh produce taught me one very important lesson. First, it gave me space and time to breathe. It also taught me to enjoy life including the simple mundane things that I do everyday. Picking the leaves and cooking a meal with them was so refreshing and delightful. For a moment, I forgot my worries of being jobless because I was focusing on the small gifts I had in front of me. I was focusing on making a warm meal for my family and thoroughly enjoyed the process of it. Are you trying to find joy in this season even though it’s hard?
The next time that we find ourselves worrying about the future, let’s remember to pause and be grateful for what we already have. Not having a job can be very discouraging. Yet, there will be a place and time for that. Maybe right now, God has something else planned for this season. It may look like enjoying friendships and connecting with the church community as you wait for jobs to respond back to you. It might look like God redirecting you towards another path. Though the future looks unsure, remember to appreciate the present. Slow down, take a deep breath of fresh air and be thankful.
Life is meant to be lived. Not planned out.
Ecclesiastes teaches us to enjoy the life process instead of being anxious about the result. The teacher in this book reminds us how temporary, random and fleeting life is. In the end, it points us to a greater God who is in control. This should give peace to our anxiety during jobless seasons. We rest in God’s character rather than our pointless perfect plans for our lives. Appreciating the small gifts God gives us right now helps release the grip for control. It gives us the opportunity to cruise through life, enjoy the process of it and be in the presence of our good God. This is what it means to live life.
